In “Quality Time Spent or Distractions: Love Languages Explained,” I think we’ve lost our moral compass when it comes to love. We’ve become so distracted by the world’s flux of inconsistencies. We are allowing this, but it doesn’t have to stay or be that way.
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How is it that Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok videos hold precedence over a loving, warm body sitting next to you that would love to have at least half of the amount of attention that one gives their phone?
The answer to that question is that you must demand it with boundaries and call the behavior out immediately. No longer do we sit on the sofa while our person is engaged with the phone instead of engaging and having interaction with us.
Quality Time Spent is a love language.
It involves both people in a relationship to be “PRESENT.” This does not mean you are looking at your phone while your beautiful person is trying to carry a conversation with you. Put down the phone, make that person feel loved by giving your undivided attention to them. Listen with both ears. Put the phone on mute so it doesn’t distract the importance of the words being said.
Open space for meaningful interaction.
Make a pact that phone get put away when you are engaging in a fun activity , for instance a couple that walks together grow together.
If your person isn’t being present and interacting; you must call it out. You are demanding respect and that you have boundaries. I do this when my sweetheart gets distracted on the phone.
“Honey: Will you unplug from the phone cause I love sharing quality time with my man and it no fun sitting here watching.”
Point blank. An honest call out on behavior. It’s not belittling him or disrespecting him. It’s a behavior, I have zero tolerance for.
Same thing at the dinner table. No phones.
See, when we can be fully present, that’s when the magic happens, the holding hands, kissing, hugs. It’s when you notice things about one another that make you fall in love all over again.
If you are feeling unhappy about you not getting the attention you deserve; it’s time for that talk. Make sure the timing is right though. Make sure they are in the same space of talking about these sensitive things.
One thing I don’t like feeling is resentment or anger towards my sweetheart, so I always to try to voice my feelings and him too.
I hope that this might have given a little insight. Sending love and light!
Linda J Wolff